流沙

an unbelievably calm night in, crafting words into the essay, accompanied by Haydn's Trio in C major H.15.27 for keyboard and strings. After a very filling dinner. lacking only a cup of lime, that would fill the air with freshness; or the scent of lavender that swept over my half-closed eyes in Provence's june.
pescetarian. remember we stopped eating meat after watching The Corporation, I'll start being a pescetarian. or like one of the TED talks say, one can also be weekday vegetarians. it's so great to get to know some people better. had a really enjoyable volunteering session and creative writing class. really! supervision was a little :| but gave me much better directions to improve the essay. reading beautiful blogs' too satisfying. what people create is so beautiful. I miss the view from the hotel room of ikebukuro, clear winter sky over Tokyo. Courage, the original definition of courage, when it first came into the English language -- it's from the Latin word cor, meaning heart -- and the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart./Brené Brown

咖啡杯

有一天，劍橋某咖啡店外放了一個手畫的看板,上面大概說自已正在讀人類學，請路過的人到咖啡店內跟她分享有趣的故事。看到某同學的面書更新，想起咖啡店那女孩: Loneliness isn't just sitting alone in your room. Loneliness is when you're so full of life and ideas and there's no one around to share that. 我也想寫個看板說、過來幫幫我的論文吧。若有這樣的文化也挺不錯。雖然這正是college的目的，但可以在輕鬆的環境下認真地(矛盾)聽更多人意見。不是很有趣嗎。記得在做跑馬地project時跟路人談話，有些人覺得這類研究十分嘥氣。在這個四成人有碩士/博士資格的城市進行這些討論，只怕唔夠氣，oh no. 我明白為什麼這裹的人都寫blog/twitter. 還有，彷彿去到那裹都聽到人從不同角度談「記憶」。教授、海報、電影也談,記得黃欣也說起過。每次把Word文件view as two pages 都會想起在跑馬地星蟲做地理科IA，以及當時的短訊對話內容、窗外的夏雨。零五年。

河邊

I like how the kids lie on the floor of the museum, there are many talks there, and I liked the room of impressionist paintings. It was very warm today, met old friends by the riverbank, the flowers smelled really nice. Had fun with a wonderful black cat.
Did way too little work.
The cat is so cute, I want to revisit him, reminds me of Lausanne.

夏雨

The conversation over dinner, on whether human beings are born evil or good, and how/when 'east asia's politics was fucked up,' did not reached any conclusion. but if human beings are born evil, perpetually insecure, and full of jealousy, history would pretty much be the same with or without colonialism. If that's the case, would it even be meaningful to teach children love/ forgiveness/ trust etc. Then, I felt I know precisely why Van Gogh committed suicide. (and seems to have written the exact same sentence in 2008 winter)
Had a reassuring class on the essay we are writing on : ) thankfully. now I just have to make sure I can write it up well, which is a real challenge. Then a seminar on Surrealism, Expressionism and Picturebook. It's often difficult to take off the pedagogical hat, and put on the literary analysis hat, to think of 'how' the picturebook achieved certain effect or allow certain unique modes of engagements instead of what the picturebooks are about.
I was in an impressionist painting last night in my dream, so tired that I couldn't even gathered myself to crawl home from st. johns. i miss soaking myself in the hk summer rain. as if letting nature paint on my body. for now, let me enjoy a moment with my dear animals that are sitting next to the soothing flowers. How do they think of my version of summer rain? cute video

花貓

討厭病。想吃粥。

明明今天應該很不錯，花很香，晴朗，遇上跟我玩的花貓，跟朋友到學校做義工。偏偏房裹日間沒暖氣，抵抗力低時總會有fever blisters/cold sore，聽說那是病毒，平時像睡火山般住在你的神經組織中.一但在你身體便會跟隨你一世。

還有，總是不太滿意正在寫的這篇文，明明不該那麼難，但可能覺得寫得不夠深度，還是繼續努力想想吧。

Two beautiful Stages.

LV SS 2012 Chanel SS 2012

dangerous when me starts watching... Simon Schama's van gogh....

黃花

漂亮的黃花，彷彿在房間裹亮起了。還有很多好吃的東西。謝謝羅醫生 ;)

收到5954里以外寄來的明信片。

收到兩個詢問有關白色貓和黃色貓的燈的電郵！
跟黃欣gchat也覺得很高興。
還收到舊朋友Chiara的電郵
開心。
剛從愛丁丁回來。
在scotland 還下雪呢。好彩在Criminology Library 過了一個下午。那是一個好的圖書館，有白爪魚同學的同類。(pic)
明天要到小學去。
想到法國的山城採花。
“Sometimes,' said Pooh, 'the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.”
― A.A. Milne

火爐

The sun shone through the dark blue clouds from a low angle, lighting up only the spires and stone houses but not the hills behind. Scotland is strangely a lot more beautiful, peaceful and familiar than I remembered. Especially the highlands, so calm, all the rivers and castles. Travelling, the airport, picking a book, falling asleep before the safety demonstration, the nice people who helped me through the journey...

apart from my magical community in niigata, here's another mysterious network, of old British families, half term holidays in the estates with hand-painted wallpaper and all those. We visited a family friend's home, also a Cambridge grad, from the same faculty, but some forty years ago. They are a musical family, in fact, they have their own organ at home...We have fresh flowers in the bedroom, and finished reading the book while having a bath, strange mix of fiction and reality, of the conversation about the family friend's son, and my host dad's brother, who both sort of got mental issues while in Cambridge, 'problems with being too smart' they say, exactly what happened to the character in the book I bought this morning committed suicide while he was in cambridge. it's difficult to describe how beautiful the Scottish estates are, imagine Mr Darcy's estate in Pride and Prejudice

紅屋頂

其中一首我最喜歡的歌。祖兒好少會咁。願傷心的事不再發生。

世間千千萬萬人 未明白我替這位空想家驚訝

孤單真的不可怕 能讓我畫滿花還未算是那麼差

♥

轉圈

'loop歌'的中文是什麼。

擦光所有火柴難令氣氛像從前閃耀

不得不把畫筆搬走，很想快點把畫好的寄走。

還有別的東西很想畫，但要先寫多一點才可以。很想畫。

“I think that I still have it in my heart someday to paint a bookshop with the front yellow and pink in the evening...like a light in the midst of the darkness.”― Vincent van Gogh

信箱

went for a quiet afternoon walk in the small neighbourhoods after meeting friends, it was so quiet and beautiful just how i wanted. freezes and freshens my mind (at the same time). when i was younger, i would spend a lot of time chatting with friends who don't feel happy, this somehow has changed, as I realize most of the time others can't help at all, it's about whether you are determined to change, to make life better. worse though, is that many of them are just habitually indulging in their problems, constantly self-pitying...

received a postcard today, love all the inspirations, supports, love and knowledge i've got in my mailbox! slowly replying everybody. and heard good news from des, so happy to have friends that i feel very happy for! and want to share all the great things I know with them! though to some contentment seems nothing but unjustified and boring, but it's not a state that just happen and stays, it takes effort to nurture and sustain. nor would it stop you from becoming a better person, i guess one at least have to believe in themselves, and take their minds off constant worries in order to shine. i love spinach.

雪印

wish i were in HK : )

林生 (jeremy lin) &林太 (cass pang) rocks the web

毛毛雪

今天，都幾好。收到信！！開始寫，寫了一千字，很不錯。明天要到學校跟小朋友做research，好緊張呀。今天在F.AMES的派對上認識了新朋友，在吃枝竹羊腩煲時，外面又開始下雪，Cambridge 下雪時很美，單車、大門，樹枝，都舖滿雪。but please let it snow, we want more snow : )

下星期會到St. John's formal hall, 好興奮呀！

鱷魚．鳥

Side by side on the sand sat two eggs. With a crack and a rip, the brothers hatch, and out comes a bird and a ...crocodile! But they can't be brothers - can they?

so tired from a day of class... Alexis Deacon, a picturebook author/ illustrator (the field should really come up with a word that means both) came and gave us a seminar today, it was so good. Love hearing the stories through the creator's voices, and their own stories, it is so good! I wish my friends heard the talk too. He read his new book, which will come out in 22 days, I have always known what picturebooks I like from the shelves, but feel like my preferences has totally expanded after being in this course. Strongly recommended! A Place to Call Home, Beegu, Croc and Bird. Also received Sara Fanelli's Wolf in the mail. :) Love my room after the ceiling light's broken. It has the yellowy ambience of a traditional home.

I really like this picture, cuz i saw two strangers started chatting, in the snow. and further down on the river, next to them, are two snowmen, probably giving thanks to their short-lived but beautiful lives.

冰氷

今天的課寫poetry。很喜歡creative writing的課呢。天氣很冷，怎麼覺得從未試過那麼冷，圓圓的月亮掛在半空中，映照在結冰的湖面上，裹面有魚嗎？這數天都很不想工作。嘗試畫畫，早點睡，聽歌，但還是那樣。希望明天上課後會好點，也許唯一的解決方法就是嘗試去做，反正也不再能不做了。這其實是我最喜歡的範疇,實在應該對自己多點信心。今天到學校跟小朋友講故事，跟他們熟了，感覺很好，有的小孩卻真的前所未見的活躍..那些漂亮的白色波波，還未知道是什麼來啊。電腦裹有很多爸媽的中國音樂，好好笑，還挺好聽的，好像回到唐朝深宵。@anfield cat

溶雪

Hmm, i often think it's interesting how much you could learn about a person just from sitting in the same cafe all the time, the cafe of turquoise wall and wooden table, exactly how i wanted. learnt that the south african person who makes coffee is a painter; and also met two really friendly people in the cafe this morning. For quite awhile, i was quite reluctant to chat with strangers, especially when travelling alone, I think now I have learnt a better equilibrium. Had a nice walk across the snowy courts of Trinity College, unbelievable suggestions from mr. octopus about rolling snowballs into the river to flood the punting travellers/or throwing snow balls into their punts...he should have done it lol lol. followed by some depressing time in UL, nice view through the bars, but too eerie as night falls. Luckily there's a nice italian dinner with two friends from the Japanese ministries to conclude the night. penniless me have new thoughts ....

宿舍

由馬田宿舍的上下格床，西翼對住Central Sq.的大大房,LPC的3/206,愛丁丁，池袋到現在，除了可以隨時把空間個人化地裝飾外，亦保留了procrastination corner 的特質。歡迎大家來我家看書/picnic, CB30HH, 有溫柔的音樂，white cashmere 的香味，很多圖畫書，還可以陪我畫畫。

房間裹的大燈壞了後...

昨晚起，面書便充滿下雪相，很多比人還要大的雪人，天真地希望整個劍橋的人，今天都像我一樣﹣一點書都沒有讀....

this book is so difficult to understand...

白雪雪

雪中漫步,雖然我唔睇電視等等，但依然花好多時間做啲唔知乜野，例如望窗外風景，今朝就足足散左三個鐘步。總覺得在室外時心情特別好，花園上厚厚厚的一層雪令人會心微笑，摸上去軟綿綿的。下雪歌？

walking in the morning is addictive

world blanketed by magical fairy-dust

下雪

下雪為我們倫敦的一天畫上圓滿句號！

沒有什麼行程，最後還是十分緊湊，見了朋友，認識了LPC 的minus 2nd year!!!!喝了好喝的咖啡，帶著もち滿載而歸。在Soho吃カツ丼時外面開始落雪，好有feel，係咪要講句聖誕快樂？但其實已經二月！差啲啲都可能返唔到嚟，等的士時其他人頭頂舖滿雪！(回家後要放入微波爐解凍-爛)。Cambridge 啲馬路好多雪，車開得很慢很慢....

只是數個小時，外面已舖滿fluffy fluffy 的軟雪(糕)

結冰

白爪魚同學到餐廳後拿出課本，書的內頁仍然很冷，對了，就是那麼冷。湖面結了不是一點點，而是厚厚的冰,好好笑！

圖畫書

天氣很冷，但天空滿是星星。

這學期要到學校裹講圖畫書，寫一篇有關兒童對圖畫書的反應/理解方式的文章。老師跟我們分享她做過同樣的研究,雖然我從來都喜歡繪本，但在這個課程裹還是學到很多新事物，有很多驚喜。很推介大家去看，有些故事很會令人思考，圖畫和文字之間的關係很有趣。很多時大人只留意故事，忽略了圖畫裹隱藏的伏線，小孩子卻看到。也有些(我認為被教壞了的)小孩只認為故事書是認字的，未能完全享受看故事的過程。小孩子們聽完故事後畫的畫也很有趣。令我很想念教畫畫的日子，越年幼的越不怕錯，只會注重心裹想表達的，不介意像不像。下次要是看繪本，找一個朋友一起看，然後從封面開始猜猜作者想說什麼，為什麼會那樣畫，也許會有意想不到的驚喜。今天路旁有人彈小竪琴，很好聽。說過好多次好好聽，但還是要再推介。從博物館裹的一百件東西看世界歴史那BBC節目。又要開始睇書喇，仲有畫畫啦。

零下

很冷很晚。

十六個spread的故事，畫了四個。

那天跟某人談天後，突然擔心我熟悉的人原來可能跟自已想像的不一樣。談了很久電話，很冷的晚上吃了很暖的羊煲，很想所有的事情都不那麼複雜。偶然感到沒有機心的危機，不過是很可悲。

突然覺得我只是一個人 有點孤單淺淺的憂鬱