Monday, April 27, 2009

'Liberal'-Chinese-lover?

"A guy friend of mine has been in a stable relationship for a few years, but there's another girl who really liked him. People all adviced her not to do anything when he already has a stable girlfriend. But she thought if he loves her so much, than he won't be shook but her seduction. So later on, the guy did started getting really close with this girl, he decided to maintain both relationships.
A few days earlier, he posted a very long article on the internal-web of their uni (equivalent to facebook) - apologizing for what he did wrong. What made him changed all of a sudden - on her original girlfriend's fourth abortion, she realized that she couldn't get pregnant anymore. He felt sorry, and promised to marry her once they graduate"

Relationship-wise, I wonder if we are fossils.
Last night, I had another great cultural lesson on modern Chinese relationships. Many of those people involved in the stories are not fictional, not internet stories, not MK kids, but real friends of my friend, in one of the top universities in China.

"Another girl from a reowned school from Hong Kong, now studying University here, really liked a homosexual guy, she liked him so much that she made him drunk deliberately so he would have sex with her, and hoping that it could turn in a relationship. But the guy was too drunk and didn't know what happened the night before, so nothing happened following the event. Knowing that she couldn't win his heart, she thought having him physically is good enough."

Match-making is very common among my friends and C's friends here in the universities. It's alright to ditch a friend if a potential guy dates you for dinner, and it might happen like monthly or weekly.

There are internal websites, where people post their own pictures, searching for girl/boyfriends. One of C's pretty friend posted her pic, and got more than 1000 replies, INCLUDING a young professor. But that girl just got accepted by Harvard grad school, the professor suggested that he could apply to be a visiting lecturer there.

When Deborah was here, she pointed out how people are so CRAZY about getting married here in China, but it's not only in China, also in Hong Kong, people have very elaborate celebration for their weddings. Here, the biggest shops in shopping malls are those like "I DO"

PDA (Public Demonstration of Affection) is also serious, The other day i was on a bus- on the second floor, there were three couples, among them, two pairs were hugging very tightly, with the girl lying on the guys' legs throughout the bus ride, the remaining pair had the girl sitting on the guy's lap even there were SO MANY empty seats.....


According to both Miranda and my observation in our architecture firms in Shanghai and Beijing, almost all guys are married, and all young pretty girls ranging from e.g. 20 - 40 are single! How amazing. The girl next to me, looks like... 26? but she's actually 32, she's very eager to get a boyfriend, mostly cuz it's a norm, she's dating randomly, doesn't really like her boyfriend. But she felt scared cuz everyone in her University class are married - some even divorced already! hark.

Yes naturally, people all around the world seems to do things like this, we might be surprised because they are Chinese, I wonder... how are Chinese perceived, and how are they actually like?

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